The Death Machine.

“You’ve changed, ” is what my quack doctor said to me after I got out of the St. Joseph psych ward.  Its, like, no kidding, man.

The truth is families don’t even know what has happened to their loved ones.

We hear it now over and over, even from pharmaceutical reps, about their own family members and how these drugs have killed their own loved ones.  Yet the powers that be keep on pushing them.  Even worse, they are putting “therapists” in schools now who are sold into the system and feed troubled kids into it for drugging.

The stigma of the ones who do this report WE are “prescription addicts” and that puts a negative connotation onto us, makes US look weak instead of them.

Yes, they do know how to deflect blame.  But THEY are the weak ones. THEY are to blame.  They are responsible.  Any addiction we have was by mistake of trusting our doctor (or in many cases a psychiatrist.)  Everyone trusts their doctors.  It is the primary challenge by egotists who want to show me I’m wrong and to show me I was the problem, and that my doctor was only trying to help.    They are full of shit.  Every time I’ve proven it, too, so that they run away.  They cannot handle the truth.

The system is reaping great profits for Wall Street investors, which includes pension funds, that most are supporting.  Big Pharma has a never ending supply of money going in because too many are being sold on that its saving lives even though its not.  Its what seems to be an unstoppable racket that is HUGE.  And here I am, little Miss Nobody, trying to tell people how they are making the money from and for a death machine.  But I’m the enemy. Well, I guess I am since I was supposed to die, right?

What makes me sad, even more, is that along the way I’ve known people to try it for themselves.  One very young woman, after listening to me, went to her doctor to get some mind drugs she said was for depression. She wanted to see if she could live the excitement I’d survived, I guess. When she told me she’d gotten them I was appalled.  That is totally irresponsible. So am I not supposed to tell this story?

And other people, even some close to me, have accepted these drugs from their doctor despite what they have seen me go through. Almost as if it is a challenge to prove their doctor is good, and maybe just mine was not.  I don’t buy it.  If any doctor is in the “business” he or she is bad. Go visit Dr. Pepper in Renton, Washington and you will find a possessed by money woman.  Anymore all the doctors are possessed, or they are poor.  Or at least they aren’t raking in the big bucks Big Pharma’s business model offers.

Even my mother received some stupid drugs when her doctor more recently told her she was depressed.  Those drugs made my mom noticeably weird so she stopped taking them when I complained, and hasn’t picked them up again.  And my mom was the primary who saved me from the Ambien debacle!!!  This proves just how brainwashed people are about trusting their doctors!  Even doctors want to prove me wrong, they are that sold into their own systems.  Yes, I am the enemy.  I’ve survived to tell.

So is my case unusual?  Yah, we’d like to think so, but I don’t believe it is.  These people are toying with our brains.  Where some talk about our 6 degrees of separation I’ll bet with regards to being negatively affected by these drugs and western medicine business practices we are less than 4 degrees of separation.  And the number is going to get worse because Big Pharma is pushing it on kids.  Yet these drugs are clearly the portals to the demons of Lucifer’s.

I can tell you that they deviated my mind.  This is personal and hard for me to share, but I began having deviated sexual fantasies that were not normal to me.  I am an average hetero sexual woman who had made love to my husband of 28 years in the tall green grass.  I loved my husband.  After all the years sex between us remained good.  We’d made love in abandoned barns in the middle of nowhere.  We’d made love under beautiful waterfalls, in warm lakes and in ice cold streams.  Our sex life and intimacy was fine.  I was never looking for someone better.  I really don’t believe he was either.  Our marriage was solid.

At the time the doctor started blowing my mind with drugs I was 49 years old and had been married for 27, almost 28 years.  My personality was established, and porn was not my thing.  I was a cookie baking, stand by your man, kind of an Aunt Judy.

Yet, suddenly I was having strange dreams with sexual fantasies that were not including my husband.  They were way outside my normal repertoires.  Also I began feverishly masturbating, which was something I had never done before!  Before I was a satisfied woman.

I’ve never spoken about any of this, either, like I’d never spoken about Frank’s gaslighting me.  This has been something very personal I’ve kept to myself to protect myself from criticism or harsh judgments, and even from the perverted thoughts of others.  I don’t remember exactly when the porn fantasies and masturbating started.  It might have been after the Ambien episode, or at the start of the Lorazepam.   I really don’t remember.  Probably fantasizing about Dr. Sargent Jr., began around the time of the Paxil, than escalated as my mind was being changed up/down and around.  And those fantasies did not include only being about Dr. Sargent Jr.   I think the porn fantasies started around the time of Paxil/Vioxx.  Its all something I haven’t really had time until now to think about.

As I’ve said before, I was all over the map.  The portals to Lucifer had been opened and the death machine was already set in place by the doctor’s father’s network (and probably many others too, who were team tagged to take out someone like me) to take me out with words and phrases whispered into the ears of people around me.   They knew what they were doing.  But, as I prepared to go to court against them, I had no idea now deep it went.  Nor did I really have an idea of what I was doing.  When prescription warning says they cause confusion, and if we do report that to out doctor, isn’t THAT confusing?  Its a terrible quagmire when a drug takes over the mind.  So preparing for court for sure I was not operating at full capacity.  I was still in la la land but gathering up as much information, relevant or not, to the case filed in the courts so that any reader could see what they were doing.  I was following the instructions of that street minister I’d never met before and have never seen since.

Families have no idea. They are not prepared for our change.  Neither are we.  How can we be?  There is no warning in the world that can prepare us when our trusted doctor hands us something we think is as harmless and as helpful as a prescription of penicillin or codeine to fix a symptom.

ADDED:  Here is a video just shared on the foster care system’s drugging of children, and even of babies.  They are opening the portals to Lucifer.  There is no doubt about it.  And there is big money in it.



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